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June 14, 2005
Tradition is a wonderful thing. Some traditions should never die.
However, there is one tradition that should be put to rest. In a way, it
already died years ago. I’m talking about Saturday Night Live.
During my lifetime, some of the hardest laugh sessions have come from
SNL. I still often quote things from some of my favorite sketches. Most of
the time, people know exactly what I am talking about, too. I can’t say,
“Could it be….Satan!” without someone knowing I’m referring to the
Churchlady.
But in the past 3 years, SNL has been a sad, sad show. I’ve tried to watch it
a few times. But I always either fall asleep or become too embarrassed
about watching such a pile of sucktitude that I change the channel. SNL has
had its share of mediocre seasons, but the show just plain sucks now. The
only episode that showed any sign of being funny in the last couple seasons
was when Will Ferrell came back to host. He brought back a few of his old
sketches to throw some life back into SNL.
I’d like to dedicate this week’s column to some of my favorite SNL skits.
Thanks to Anthony (Tonebone) for introducing me to some of these in your
infamous SNL tape.
The Cowbell Episode: In a parody of VH1’s Behind the Music, Blue Oyster
Cult was shown in the recording studio with famous producer, Bruce
Dickinson (Christopher Walken). They kept trying to get a few takes of
Urban Toonces: Toonces the Driving Cat was a character originally
introduced by Steve Martin. Toonces could drive, but he always managed to
drive the car off of a cliff. This episode was a spoof of Urban Cowboy.
Toonces came into the bar and ordered lots of tequila shots. He managed
to ride the bull and by the end of the night,
Spade in America: This was a show once known as the Hollywood Minute
and hosted by David Spade. Spade would comment on the newest trends in
Mr. Robinson’s Neighborhood: This was
Matt Foley, Motivational Speaker: He had
Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer: Phil Hartman was great as the thawed-out
Tarzan, Tonto, and Frankenstein
Harry Caray: Will Ferrell plays the Chigaco
Celebrity Jeopardy: Will Ferrell plays Alex Trebek and he is tormented by
dimwitted celebrities. Some of the guests include Michal Keaton who thinks
he’s Batman, Keanu Reeves who thinks he knows
There were 2 complete episodes that totally stick out in my mind as being
funny all the way through. Jim Carrey hosted once and his lifeguard skit, the
Spartan cheerlead skit, and the “Roxbury” party guys skit were some of the
funniest. Kevin Spacey also hosted a hilarious episode. The Star Wars
auditions was by far to funniest skit on that show and it is something I still
quote today amongst friends.
So as you can see, I am a Saturday Night Live fan. I really wish the show
could return to the greatness that it once was. I bought the “Best of Will
Ferrell” DVD and I watch it and think that they take the stupidest ideas and
make them funny. Nowadays, they take even dumber ideas and they still
turn out to be crap. Maybe executive producer Lorne Michaels has lost his
touch. Maybe he just needs a few standout cast members. Whatever the
case is, if the show keeps pumping out the kind of excrement that they are
putting out now, I’d rather it be off the air.
I’m out for now. Throw up a “T” for…
T-BONE!
Josh 'T-Bone' Pigott
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SNL... Schwing!
The Bone Pile
“Don't Fear the Reaper”, but some of the
band members took exception to Gene
(Will Ferrell) and his cowbell playing.
Dickinson, however, was enthralled by the
cowbell and kept wanting more of it. “I’ve
got a fever, and the only prescription, is
more cowbell!” This was one of the
funniest sketches I’ve ever seen.
Sprockets: This was a regular sketch with Mike
Myers playing a German television host. It was done
to a stereotype we have of the German new wave
concept. The most notable line in each episode had
Meyer’s telling his guest, “You may not touch my
monkey”. After a while, it was overdone, but the
original idea was brilliant.
everyone was a bit tipsy. Carvey, who
played a great Travolta, noted that
Toonces should drive them home since he
had a license and had a big plate of tacos
with his tequila. Toonces did drive and
was doing well, as always, until he drove
off that damn cliff again.
movies, music, and pop culture. Here are a
couple examples: “Casino. Ca-seen it.
Personally, I liked it better when it was called
Goodfellas.” Or “Stone Temple Pilots, they are
a good band. But I liked them better when they
called themselves Pearl Jam.” It was that style
of humor.
Eddie Murphy at his best. He played a
black Mr. Rogers and welcomed everyone
to his hood. Words cannot do this one
justice.
The Ladies Man: Tim Meadows played radio host,
Leon Phelps, the Ladies Man. He’d give advice to
callers on sexual situations and was usually crude
and uneducated in answering their queries. His
answer to most of the guys was to “do her in the
butt.” And he always had his sensual oils and
Courvoisier on hand, because he was Mr. GQ
Smooth.
a great message. If you don't discontinue
promiscuity and drug usage, you end up "in a
van, down by the river.” Farley usually
ended up wrecking the set because he got so
worked up about it. This was Farley at his
best. He could play the part of a bumbling,
frustrated, fat guy like no other.
caveman who becomes a lawyer. He wins his trials
by stating things like “I’m just a caveman. Your rules
and laws frighten and confuse me.” He’d win all of
his cases because of his simplicity and nobody
wanted to discriminate against the famous caveman
lawyer.
Sing Christmas Carols: This one
is pretty self explanatory. Lots of
groaning and mumbling, but
hilarious.
The Ambiguously Gay Duo: This is a
Robert Smigel cartoon about two superheros,
Ace and Gary. There is a lot of sexual
innuendo, and it isn’t helped by the fact that
their car looks like a penis with testicles.
Cubs announcer in an array of funny
situations. He tells a scientist that his
favorite planet is the Sun because it’s the
king of planets. He asks Colin Quinn “If
you were a hot dog, and starving to death,
would you eat yourself?” Even if you don’t
know who Harry Carray is, you will laugh
your butt off watching these skits.
The Weekend Update: This
one has been funny with
different hosts. Some of the
guests are classic. Cajun Man
is my favorite, but Opera Man
and Grumpy Old Man were
classic, too.
Kung Fu, Jeff Goldblum who is too busy doing
Tai Chi to answer the questions correctly, Burt
Reynolds who wants his name changed to Turd
Ferguson, and most famously, Sean Connery
who’s sole mission is to upset Trebek (mostly
with jokes about his mom).
Saturday Night Live (SNL) is a weekly
late-night 90-minute comedy-variety
show from NBC which has been
broadcast virtually every Saturday
night since its debut on October 11,
1975. It is one of the longest-running
network entertainment programs in
American television history. Each
week, the show's cast is joined by a
guest host and a musical act.
The show has been the launching
place for some major American
comedy stars of the last thirty years. It
was created by Dick Ebersol and Lorne
Michaels, of whom, the latter —
excluding a hiatus from Season 6
through Season 10—has produced
and written for the show and remains
its executive producer (Jean
Doumanian producing most of Season
6, and Ebersol 7-10).
In January 2005, NBC renewed SNL's
contract until 2012.
The show usually follows a standard
format. It opens with a sketch, known
as the cold opening, which begins
without any announcement or titles, is
often about politics or other current
events, and always ends with someone
saying "Live from New York, it's
Saturday Night!" The show then
segues into the opening credits, which
usually open with a shot of the Statue
of Liberty and a montage of the cast
members cut with various locations
around the city. The opening credits
are voiced-over by long-time NBC
announcer Don Pardo. The show's
theme music has been re-arranged
many times, but always follows the
same basic chord patterns.
Next is the opening monologue
performed by the guest host(s), often
followed by a TV commercial parody.
The show continues with more
comedy skits (sketches might feature
recurring characters, running gags,
celebrity impersonations, movie and
TV spoofs, and skits parodying the
news issues of the day), followed by a
performance by the guest musical act.
More recent shows have the second
act divided by an animated short by
Robert Smigel. The news parody
segment Weekend Update marks the
show's midway point. The second half
of the program continues with more
sketches, and in most cases a second
performance by the musical guest.
Some shows also feature filmed
segments, often featuring cast
members, or it may feature
independent film shorts. In a few rare
cases, a third musical performance by
the week's musical guest is done at the
end of the show, but in most instances
this is just a goodbye segment by the
host and musical guest.
The following is a summary of the
process used to produce the show. It is
based in part on an August 2000
Writer's Digest article and an April
2004 Fresh Air interview with Tina Fey:
Monday: The day begins with a
topical meeting, identifying the
biggest story for the show's opening.
This is followed by a free-form pitch
meeting with Lorne Michaels and the
show's host for the week. According to
an October 2004 60 Minutes segment
on the show, throughout the week the
host has a lot of influence on which
sketches get aired. Following the
meeting, writers begin to draft the two
scripts each must produce.
Tuesday: Starting in the afternoon,
anywhere from 30 to 45 scripts are
written, significantly more than will
make it to air. Most writers work
through the night. Once a writer's
scripts are complete, he or she will
often help other writers on their scripts.
Wednesday: All scripts get a read-
through. After the read-through, the
head writer(s) and the producers meet
with the host to decide which sketches
to work on for the rest of the week, with
Lorne Michaels and the host having
the final say.
Thursday: The surviving sketches are
reviewed, word-by-word, by the writing
staff as a whole (or in two groups in the
case of co-head writers). Some
sketches which survived the cut
because of their premise but otherwise
needed a lot of work are rewritten
completely. Others are changed in
smaller ways. Thursday is also the day
that Weekend Update starts coming
together, starting with the news items
written by writers dedicated all week to
the segment. This is also the first day
the crew comes in for rehearsal. The
music act is rehearsed as well as some
of the larger more important skits.
Friday: the show is blocked (staged).
The writer of each skit acts as
producer, working with the show's set
designers and costumers.
Saturday: With the show still far from
finalized, the day begins with a run-
through, with props, in front of Lorne
Michaels. After the run-through, the
cast and crew find out which of the
sketches are in the dress rehearsal,
and which are cut. The
writer/producer deals with any
changes. This is followed by an 8 p.m.
dress rehearsal in front of a live
audience, which lasts until 10 p.m. or
sometimes later, and which contains
around twenty minutes of material
which will not make it to the
broadcast. Lorne Michaels uses first-
hand observation of the audience
reaction to the rehearsal, and input
from the host, to determine the final
round of changes, re-ordering sketches
as necessary. The show then begins at
11:30 p.m. (Eastern Time).
The status of the show during the week
is maintained on a bulletin board.
Sketches and other segments are
given labels which are put on index
cards and put on the board in the
order of their performance. The order
is based on content as well as
production limitations such as camera
placement and performer availability.
Segments which have been cut are
kept to the side of the board. As the
broadcast approaches, often the
writer/producer discovers the fate of
his or her segment only by consulting
the bulletin board.
A 60 Minutes report taped in October
2004 depicted the intense writing
frenzy that goes on during the week
leading up to a show, with crowded
meetings and long hours. The report
particularly noted the involvement of
the guest hosts in developing and
selecting the skits in which they will
appear.
The following performers have hosted
SNL at least five times:
Steve Martin (13)
John Goodman (12)
Alec Baldwin (11)
Buck Henry (10)
Chevy Chase (8)
Tom Hanks (7)
Danny DeVito (6)
Elliott Gould (6)
Christopher Walken (6)
Candice Bergen (5)
Bill Murray (5)
Several special episodes of SNL have
been compiled and aired that were
"best of" episodes of several of these
hosts, including Christopher Walken
and Tom Hanks.
